NHL Power Rankings: Looking at who’s got puck luck — and who needs it

0
NHL Power Rankings: Looking at who’s got puck luck — and who needs it

St. Patrick’s Day always makes this time of year unique in Ireland, but this March is an especially big one for “The Emerald Isle.”

On Sunday — two days before St. Paddy’s — County Kerry’s Jessie Buckley will be at the Oscars in Los Angeles, hoping to win in the best actress category for her lead role in Hamnet. A couple of weeks later, the men’s soccer team will play a crucial World Cup qualifier in Czechia. If the green guys win, they’ll play on the final day of March — in Ireland — with a chance to book their first trip to the globe’s grand footy tournament in 24 years. 

Yes, the Irish will be plucking extra clovers and rubbing the rabbit’s foot a little more vigorously this March.

Of course, NHL teams are always looking for luck anywhere they can find it this time of year. Some are after wins that mean a better chance of home-ice advantage in the playoffs or grabbing crucial points in a post-season chase.

Other squads, meanwhile, are looking down the road a couple of months to May, when the NHL Draft Lottery is typically held. At this juncture, every loss feels like it can put a couple of percentage points in your favour in terms of drafting a franchise-altering stud.

And, once that lottery arrives, GMs are calling on every leprechaun they know to foster a little bit of good fortune.

So, with St. Patrick’s Day landing right in the middle of a huge month for the NHL and Ireland itself, we figured it was time for a little fun. At the risk of offending the great artists and poets produced from that magical island, here’s a rhyming power ranking that puts a green tint on all 32 clubs.

  • 32 Thoughts: The Podcast
  • 32 Thoughts: The Podcast

    Hockey fans already know the name, but this is not the blog. From Sportsnet, 32 Thoughts: The Podcast with NHL Insider Elliotte Friedman and Kyle Bukauskas is a weekly deep dive into the biggest news and interviews from the hockey world.

    Latest episode

1. Colorado Avalanche (43-11-9) This team was already dangerous with Makar and Mac/ with Kadri returning, their centre crew is a hack. 

2. Dallas Stars (40-14-10) It’s a scary sight when this team fully flexes/ if the Stars can finally do it when it counts, they’ll be a Cup party in Texas. 

3. Buffalo Sabres (40-19-6) After 14 years out of the playoffs, this team was due for a bounce/ but who could have predicted this kind of Buffalo trounce?

4. Carolina Hurricanes (41-17-6) In Raleigh, it’s always “In Rod We Trust”/ getting more scoring when it counts, though, remains a Hurricanes must. 

5. Minnesota Wild (38-16-11) Everything in Minnesota is run by a GM we might call “Wild Bill”/ now it’s up to Boldy, Hughes and Kaprizov to deliver the playoff thrill. 

6. Tampa Bay Lightning (39-20-4) For most of the year, life has been good as a Bolt/ with one win in its past seven, however, Tampa could use a jolt. 

7. Montreal Canadiens (36-18-10) The Bell Centre will be electric in April, perhaps even into May/ if things come together, this young team can make playoff hay. 

8. Boston Bruins (36-22-6) At this time last year, it was the Boston Ruins/ that taught us to bet against the winning culture of the Bruins. 

9. Columbus Blue Jackets (33-21-10) Hiring veteran coach Rick has definitely been a bonus/ making the playoffs is now the Jackets players’ onus. 

10. New York Islanders (37-23-5) The Isles are coached by their own St. Patrick/ his presence with Sorokin and Schaefer is quite an NY hat trick. 

11. Pittsburgh Penguins (32-17-15) Give it up for the Pens, who’ve surely surprised us all/ Pittsburgh is getting wins while still building for the long haul. 

12. Anaheim Ducks (36-25-3) The Ducks will return to the playoffs and could be in line for more/ in the Pacific Division, Anaheim has a path to the final four. 

13. Detroit Red Wings (36-22-7) March has been a bad month for Detroit in the past couple seasons/ Wings fans worried about a slip certainly have their reasons. 

14. Ottawa Senators (32-23-9) A return to the playoffs is looking increasingly tough/ no way around it, the crease play has not been up to snuff. 

15. Edmonton Oilers (32-25-8) To say the least, it’s been an uneven season for the Oil/ when all is said and done, will lacklustre goaltending still be this team’s foil?

16. Utah Mammoth (34-26-5) The Mammoth made a great deadline addition with MacKenzie Weegar/ for some playoff action, this group could not be more eager. 

17. Washington Capitals (32-27-7) Increasingly, it’s something we must contemplate/ are there just 16 NHL games remaining for the “Great 8?”

18. San Jose Sharks (30-26-6) Making the playoffs would be such a huge win/ who knew it was already time to fear the Fin?

19. Philadelphia Flyers (30-23-11) The Flyers are headed for a finish in the mushy middle/ too many seasons like that help a rebuild very little. 

20. Vegas Golden Knights (29-22-14) In their past 18, the Knights are 5-11-2/ without a few more stops, there’s not much this squad can do. 

21. New Jersey Devils (32-30-2) It feels like the disappointing Devils are reaching an organizational inflection point/ change is coming, and some people are gonna get tossed from the joint. 

22. Los Angeles Kings (26-23-15) It’s been a dozen years since the Kings have seen the second round/ is there any chance that changes this spring, even if they are playoff bound?

23. Seattle Kraken (29-25-9) Seattle is perpetually in search of high-end skill/ maybe this summer, they’ll find the right trade partner and finally make a kill. 

24. Florida Panthers (32-29-3) One year off, then right back in the championship mix/ getting a healthy, rested roster for September is Florida’s perfect fix. 

25. Nashville Predators (29-27-8) Things have gotten downright weird in the land of honkey-tonks/ the next GM better be one incredible hockey wonk. 

26. Winnipeg Jets (26-27-10) The Jets need to find some secondary guys who can score/ do that, and, come next year, they could once again soar. 

27. St. Louis Blues (25-29-10) Trade Thomas? Trade Parayko? Where did it all go wrong?/ This is turning into a real-life blues song. 

28. New York Rangers (26-30-8) No team in the league is quicker to write a letter/ Dear Rangers, put the pen away and wake us up when you’re better. 

29. Toronto Maple Leafs (27-27-11) Goodness gracious, what a tough time for the Buds/ green or not, the old St. Pats surely feel like reaching for some suds.  

30. Chicago Blackhawks (24-29-11) Rebuilds are tough, but should it feel this hard?/ It’s easy to feel bad for Connor Bedard. 

31. Calgary Flames (25-32-7) In their Calgary history, the Flames have never held a top-three pick/ some lottery luck — with the new arena coming — would be positively sick. 

32. Vancouver Canucks (19-37-8) Wins are scarce in Vancouver, but it shouldn’t be all doom and gloom on the West Coast/ embracing a full rebuild is scary, but also something to toast. 

Comments are closed.